4 Reasons You Hate Your Body

Aug 17, 2017 by

4 Reasons You Hate Your Body

Do you hate your body? Or maybe there are parts that you despise or are disgusted about?

While this may be a common sentiment, is it an okay feeling to have? Even more importantly, is it okay for Christians?

Let’s look at four issues that usually contribute to feeling disgust toward yourself and see if any ring true for you.

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Are You Damaged Goods?

Aug 10, 2017 by

Are You Damaged Goods?

When the impact of past hurts, abuse, or neglect turn up in your daily life, it can feel like you can’t get away from it. Even when you’ve gotten some level of healing, more shows up. It can seem as though it has a permanent hold on you, perhaps even defining you.

After so many years it feels like it’s “who you are,” as opposed to what “happened to you.”

It can leave the discouraging feeling that you are damaged goods.

Is this really the case? Is the possibility of healing and change out of range for you?

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The Gift of Validating What Happened to You

Aug 3, 2017 by

The Gift of Validating What Happened to You

One of the most powerful tools for healing past hurts is knowing that someone finally understands.

How painful it is when you’ve shared with a friend how your mom ignored you as a child and she responds, “Well, no parent is perfect.”

Or, you finally tell your husband about the sex acts your older brother demanded of you. And you’re horrifyingly met with, “Boys will be boys. You need to move on from that and not make a big deal out of it.”

Even worse, you may have told your mom about dad having molested you when you were a preteen and she turns her back and walks away, never to speak of it again.

What’s missing in all these scenarios is the feeling that someone believes you that it really was as bad as it felt.

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Steps to Defeat Discouragement

Jul 27, 2017 by

Steps to Defeat Discouragement

What should you do when you’re discouraged?

Everyone has those times when they feel as though everywhere they turn they’re running into a brick wall and feel absolutely stuck.

Maybe the issue is your health. It could be you have a painful condition that is keeping you from enjoying your family or being able to work.

Perhaps the hindrance is your friendships. Maybe it seems that no matter to which person you turn, no one has time for you.

Or it could be finances, with one catastrophe after another occurring, resulting in a continual deficit in your budget.

Then again, you could have all of these and more going on at the same time. This, understandably, would lead to overwhelm and result is discouragement that anything could ever improve.

What can you do in times like this? What can you do when you’re discouraged?

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How to Immerse Yourself in the Word

Jul 20, 2017 by

How to Immerse Yourself in the Word

I would love to be able to write you a prescription for a medication that solves all your problems. It would make me feel so happy to be able to help you in such a way.

However, I’m not a doctor (I’m a licensed professional clinical counselor) nor is there such a medication.

There is something I can prescribe for you, though, that can lift your mood by changing how you view yourself. It can help you feel loved and lovable. It can reveal purpose to you and give you guidance for relationships.

It can even take the pain of the past and turn it for good.

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The Power of Praying for Discernment

Jul 13, 2017 by

The Power of Praying for Discernment

When I was pregnant with my second son, I felt very strongly that God wanted me to quit my job to stay home with my children. I knew the importance, however, of praying for discernment since this would be a major change in my life.

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6 Simple Ways to Journal to Calm Emotions

Jul 5, 2017 by

6 Simple Ways to Journal to Calm Emotions

In my last post, I talked about five reasons why journaling will benefit you when you’re feeling anxious and caught up in a tangle of fearful or depressing thoughts.

In this article, I want to give you some simple ideas for how to journal to calm your emotions.

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5 Reasons to Journal When Feeling Anxious

Jun 20, 2017 by

5 Reasons to Journal When Feeling Anxious

“I don’t journal. I really don’t have time. Besides, it’s not my thing,” said Carla. I had heard this from clients before, so I wasn’t surprised she didn’t see the value in journaling.

Carla, like many of my clients, was caught up in negative anxious thoughts that kept her from being able to focus or to have peace and joy.

Her anxious brain kept her going at a frantic pace while also never accomplishing anything significant.

I spent the next few minutes explaining to her why it’s so powerful to journal when feeling anxious.

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In Honor of My Father, My Dad Who Abused Me

Jun 15, 2017 by

In Honor of My Father, My Dad Who Abused Me

One of the hardest things I’ve had to do in life is reconcile with the harshly contrasting ideas that I had a father who loved me but who also sexually abused me.

Yet, being able to hold both concepts together radically changed my life.

(Warning: you may find the following story difficult to read. Just so you know, I have not given any explicit details. However, I cannot guarantee the story won’t trigger any abuse memories you may have.)

My hope with this article is that it will give you direction if your dad abused you (or anyone else for that matter).

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Are You Helping Too Much?

Jun 8, 2017 by

Are You Helping Too Much?

It’s hard to know sometimes whether you’re helping someone or actually helping too much.

Some people might refer to this as controlling, which I’ve written about before.

Basically, controlling behaviors are rooted in your own anxieties.

“But,” you may say, “I have a good heart and really want to help.”

I believe you. However, in order to know if you’ve crossed the line with your helping, so that you’re maybe helping too much, here are some guidelines to make it more clear.

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Hope When Your Child Is Not Walking with God

May 31, 2017 by

Hope When Your Child Is Not Walking with God

If you’ve raised your children “in the church” and lived in such a way to demonstrate to them that faith in God is important, it’s so incredibly painful to see them not walking with God.

Then again, maybe you had serious struggles as a young adult and didn’t even know to recognize and submit to Jesus as being in charge of your life. And, now that you’ve recognized his incredible love for you, you want nothing more than to see your child make the same discovery.

Well, I have to be truthful, I don’t have a magic formula or even a miraculous prayer that can make your child see the truth of how beautiful Jesus is and how God’s ways not only make sense but will bring the most joy to his or her your life.

I have, however, learned an important stance to take that can empower your prayers and give you peace in your heart.

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Complete Emotional Healing – Don’t Miss This Step

May 24, 2017 by

Complete Emotional Healing – Don’t Miss This Step

Are you feeling stuck in your pain and wondering why? Are you wondering how you could ever move beyond past hurts and get complete emotional healing?

It’s so frustrating when you repeat the same patterns over and over — pushing others away, withdrawing, or questioning if you’re loved. Or, maybe you continually view yourself as less important than others and not worth their time.

To help you, there’s plenty you could be doing on your own right now, such as gaining insight by reading and journaling.

A starting point could be Why You Do the Things You Do: The Secret to Healthy Relationships by Dr. Tim Clinton, president of the American Association of Christian Counselors.

You could consider how family dysfunction has played into how you view yourself and how you interact within relationships.

If you were abused as a child, you might want to consider if there’s a part of you that believes it was your fault.

Similarly, if you were raped at any time, this article could help.

Of course, there’s much more…but…there’s one element you shouldn’t miss.

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