One of my biggest desires is to trust God more. I want to be able to rest in knowing He's got my back, that He sees me and is looking out for me. (See also: "Essentials for Spiritual Maturity".)

Oftentimes, what I hear from women who desire the same is an incorrect method of trying to obtain this trait in their own lives.

Today, let's look at this number one reason why you get stuck in anxiety, worry, and depression instead of trusting God.

Just Do It

When you're caught up in worries and wanting to trust God, the way women often attempt to get this is to try to force themselves to just do it.

Somehow, they believe they can force themselves to automatically stop having anxious or depressed thoughts and feelings and turn into a person who is calm and confident knowing her Heavenly Father is in control and loves her incredibly.

However, you cannot simply BE someone else. You can't BE a woman who moves through life in joy and peace if you're instead one who automatically defaults toward worry and depression.

Why Just Do It Doesn't Work

The ability to trust God is very much related to your ability to trust people. 

This ability is a learned behavior that developed (for the most part) before the age of four.

When you were a helpless, crying infant, you needed people to reassure you that, even though you couldn't take care of yourself, you are valuable enough to be cared for. These important people (mainly your parents) mirrored to you through their eyes that you were special. Their tender care and attentiveness to your needs built a trust within you that if you cry out, it will matter and others will come to your aide.

This building of trust actually shaped the growth of your brain -- actual neurons and neural pathways were formed.

If, for some reason, this loving care wasn't consistently available to you, your brain's right prefrontal cortex (the part that signals joy and peace to us) would have formed in a way that wasn't as God had designed it. You, therefore, will default toward the tendency to worry and become depressed and struggle to trust and rest.

Learning to Trust and Grow Spiritually

Fortunately, this part of the brain can be reshaped by creating new neurons.

We work on this in my Private Online Community when we focus on our response patterns and changing them. 

Your response pattern is an automatic way in which you react to hurts and fears in life and it stems from this malformed part of your brain.

To change, you need to become aware of your response pattern and consistently make small changes to it. This is a slow, gradual change but is never-the-less real and powerful.

What you will be doing is training yourself to actually BECOME a woman who lives life from a place of joy and peace rather than one who believes she is the only one whom she can truly trust to bring good to her life.

Using Scripture can help with this, that's why I've created a FREE resource for you to change your self-image and view of God by applying verses to your response patterns.

Tawnya Kordenbrock
Tawnya Kordenbrock

Tawnya Kordenbrock is a licensed professional clinical counselor and an online coach. She provides hope and healing for damaged lives, training you to love yourself, feel connected to others, and walk in the good God has planned for your life.